I came across this Welcome notice from a church called Our Lady of Lourdes Catholic Community. I don’t know where it is but I’m assuming in the USA. If I suggested this to our Vestry here at Christ Church I’m not sure what their reaction would be, but I’d love to have that conversation and may just do that!
We extend a special welcome to those who are single, married, divorced, gay, filthy rich, dirt poor, yo no habla Ingles. We extend a special welcome to those who are crying new-borns, skinny as a rail or could afford to lose a few pounds.
We welcome you if you can sing like Andrea Bocelli or like our pastor who can’t carry a note in a bucket. You’re welcome here if you’re “just browsing,” just woke up or just got out of jail. We don’t care if you’re more Catholic than the Pope, or haven’t been in church since little Joey’s Baptism.
We extend a special welcome to those who are over 60 but not grown up yet, and to teenagers who are growing up too fast. We welcome soccer moms, *NASCAR dads, starving artists, tree-huggers, latte-sippers, vegetarians, junk-food eaters. We welcome those who are in recovery or still addicted. We welcome you if you’re having problems or you’re down in the dumps or if you don’t like “organized religion,” we’ve been there too.
If you blew all your offering money at the dog track, you’re welcome here. We offer a special welcome to those who think the earth is flat, work too hard, don’t work, can’t spell, or because grandma is in town and wanted to go to church.
We welcome those who are inked, pierced or both. We offer a special welcome to those who could use a prayer right now, had religion shoved down your throat as a kid or got lost in traffic and wound up here by mistake. We welcome tourists, seekers and doubters, bleeding hearts … and you!
*National Association for Stock Car Racing
There are a few things I’d like to add. Things like:
- We welcome those who are bi, straight, not quite sure, transgender, cross-dressers and all shades in between.
- We welcome those who are bi-polar, down or up, bewildered, confused and don’t remember what day it is and thought you were coming for a coffee morning.
- We welcome those with purple hair, those who can’t stand for long, and those who weep at the slightest thing. (We provide hankies too.)
- We love to welcome those who shuffle on their bottoms or who have just learned to walk and want to explore every nook and cranny of this dusty old building. We rejoice at those who can hurdle down the pews and shuffle all the hymn board numbers out of their box. We laugh with those who find the safety torch and shine it swooping on the starry ceiling.
- We extend a special welcome to those who promise only to come at Easter and Christmas, to those who come only for the great passages of rite: baptisms, weddings, Confirmations and funerals. We will even give you some bread and wine too if you want.
- We welcome you if you answer rhetorical questions during the sermon, if you clap spontaneously, and if you fall asleep and gently snore.
- We will give you such a special smiley welcome if we need to get the ramp out for your wheelchair, or open the double doors for your buggy. We don’t mind walkers, zimmer frames, or clattering walking sticks. And if you can’t hear very well we promise always to use the loop system. We welcome those who can’t see very well and can give you large print copies and even braille.
Anything you want to add?